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Save Point

So I saved Sunday although I almost didn’t. I finished late yes on the sideline tasks and there were a couple I didn’t get to do at all. I thought I’d slide them into the early hours of the morning and then pretend they never happened. But I knew it wouldn’t turn out well. I knew I’d regret it. So I’m setting the alarm early for Monday morning instead and keeping Sunday absolutely free.

The downside of having worked on a Saturday was that I didn’t have an errand day and a day for active rest (i.e. physical but restful activities that yield tangible output such as making art and rearranging books). So this morning I had to struggle a bit with that too and felt bad for a few hours for not having the energy to do stuff. I didn’t get to do any art stuff not even to putter about in the studio. I was so tired from the too-long work week that ate up even my me-days that all I did was lie in bed and get things done through my phone.

For one thing, I paid bills. A paycheck did come through as hoped and I was able to settle all of this month’s dues — and tomorrow I will be able to deposit for rent to lessen the overdue amount. I also made budget lists — especially for my dad’s medical check-up and medicines.

But I won’t be able to do any errands until Thursday afternoon. A project deadline looms on Wednesday and I’m still not certain how I’ll pull through.

I was able to listen to music today, which is a very good thing. It means I am not so numbed out as a few days ago. It means I can still dream and my heart still hopes.

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